6. In the best sex scenes, people often have something to lose. This goes along with the notion that sex is about other things besides sex. There’s a reason why we’re more interested in sex between people who are emotionally vulnerable, or cheating on someone, or trying to prove something, than in sex between two well-adjusted people who are feeling completely secure. A good sex scene is quite often suspenseful — like, if this doesn’t go the right way, someone is going to be in a bad way. If both people in the scene are trying to show that they’re in control of what’s happening, that can be more interesting — but so can watching someone who’s always in control give up control, and face the potential consequences.
I got into something of a cooking frenzy, yesterday. I blame Ina, because I was watching her show and she made this summer pasta dish and I thought, “I can make this and then I won’t have to cook again between now and when I go out of town on Thursday.”
The previous night, I fell asleep…
Roxane Gay talks through cooking in the best way (“Next I fake julienned a quantity of basil which is to say I was not graceful in my knife work”), gives excellent/thoughtful love life advice, and talks about The Bachelorette.
Girl crush activated. Cannot wait to get the galley for Bad Feminist.
The two times I’ve been messaged by OkCupid guys who were explicitly into D/s, they’ve made a point of saying that they’re nothing like Fifty Shades of Grey on their profiles… and then messaged me asking my thoughts on the book.
I guess this silly profile pic makes for a good conversation starter:
I think that part of my reluctance to regularly blog on my Tumblr is that it’s what I do for my day job. So sure, it’s somewhat about the exhaustion, but also that I hold myself to such exacting standards of quality, that I can’t reconcile putting out a post that may not have been triple-checked and 100% smoothly produced.
But by that reasoning, I haven’t regularly updated this thing in about a year. So instead, I’m going to throw on sloppy. off-the-cuff, hopefully still intelligent updates, and not agonize over how perfect they are. I’d rather keep people posted about my life and, y’know, actually talk about playwriting and pop culture and dating and fandom GIFs.
Even just putting this down has been incredibly freeing.